KEPS
by Pharynx
Summary: He was wandering the streets of Konoha in the darkness. No one would recognize him with his black robe and hood up. Rated for ... well things... NO, not KakashixYondaime!
1. Chapter 1

_I'm only gonna say this once, I don't own Naruto or the other chars. _

_The evil plot bunny wanted me to write this. _

**Prologue.**

_He _was wandering the streets of Konoha in the darkness. It was late evening and it seemed like the city had closed down for the night, the birds had even stopped their chirping. Night had fallen earlier than_ he_ thought. The black robe he was wearing covered his whole body and with the hood up_ he_ wasn't recognizable. No one that saw _him_ would ever be the one that guessed right. _He_ was walking towards the Hokage tower, it seemed to be no one there. The whole town was empty, streets abandoned. Then _he_ saw him, the younger version of_ himself_ not that _he_ was his father but_ he_ felt that special connection with him.

They walked together down the quiet street and arrived at the darkened Hokage tower, looked around them, by all means they were in a ninja village. No one following, they nodded to each other and sneaked in, this was the older male's territory and the sneaking his speciality. They got closer to the Hokage's office and _he_ turned right at the door next to it, the younger one looked at him with curious eyes. This was it, they went in, it was a cleaning closet. Mops and buckets all over the place but it seemed that the rear wall was empty. The older one knocked on the wall three times.

"Enter." Said a dark voice they recognized and they did.

They pulled down their hoods, looking around the younger one recognized everyone there.

Sitting in a circle there were the perverted Jiraya, Sandaime Hokage and his son Sarutobi Asuma, the Hyuuga twins Hiashi and Hizashi, the senbon user Shiranui Genma, the younger one's friend Uchiha Obito, the scarred Morino Ibiki and the shy Umino Iruka.

"Welcome Yondaime-sama." They all greeted the older one.

"Welcome Kakashi-kun. This is KEPS. Now let the meeting begin." Yondaime said.

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A/N:

Does it sound good?

Can anyone guess what KEPS stands for?

I'll tell you in chapter 1 – also giving MAJOR credits for guessing right. Pyloris cant compete :p

Should I continue?

Reviews are much appreciated. Answers will be given.

/Pharynx


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry I haven't updated in such a long time, but now it's here and enjoy.

Standard disclaimer applies.

* * *

Last time:

"_Welcome Yondaime-sama." They all greeted the older one._

"_Welcome Kakashi-kun. This is KEPS. Now let the meeting begin." Yondaime said. _

* * *

"KEPS?" Kakashi wondered as they sat down in a circle on the floor.

"Welcome youngster, this is the Konoha Expert Peeping Squad." The perverted frog hermit told the silver haired thirteen years old while smirking.

"P-p-peeping?" Iruka stuttered, obviously he too was new here.

"Ehrm, Kakashi-kun…" the Yondaime Hokage began and turned to the youngster at his side continuing:

"This is a branch of torture and interrogation, the Konoha Expert Prosecuting Squad. But at night we are ordinary people with a certain interest in the female body."

"Oh." Kakashi, Obito and Iruka nodded as Genma smirked and the stone faced Ibiki didn't show any emotion, he was only there because he wanted the torture and interrogating part.

"I should have known…" Sarutobi Asuma sighed and shook his head.

Kakashi looked around, trying to figure out why everyone was so depressed.

"Is there something wrong? Should we leave?" Obito was the one seeking approval; he was always trying to get acknowledged by everyone around him. That had a simple reason, he had made chuunin without his family bloodline limit, the Sharingan, but now Kakashi was entering the jounin exams in a couple of months. Obito wanted nothing more than entering the exams with his best friend/rival.

"No Obito-san, you shouldn't leave. We do have a lot of new faces here tonight." Sandaime said looking around.

"Now on with the rules. Rule number one: KEPS is a secret branch of T&I and it's a well kept secret from all of Konoha's shinobis. Just the few people outsie ot this room knows about it. And no women knows, with the exeption of Tsunade-hime." Jiraya told the others and the two Hokages nodded approvingly.

"Rule number two; no, and I mean NO one with a bowlcut and green leotard are welcome in this room during meetings!" Yondaime shrugged, just thinking about Maito Gai gave him the creeps. (A/N; in early manga/anime Kakashi is 26 and Gai 30)

"So Yondaime, why should we accept Obito in KEPS?" Jiraya said.

"Because Obito needs to work with his Sharingan, as well as trigger it." Yondaime Hokagen explained, Sandaime and Jiraya nodded.

"Why should we accept Kakashi in KEPS?" Sandaime wondered.

"Because he is walking in his sensei's footsteps." Yondaime smirked.

"And what do you mean by that?" Sandaime snickered.

"Sandaime was 13, Jiraya was 13 and I was 12…" the blonde explained.

"Aaaah" the tow men nodded.

"What are you talking about?" Asuma wondered.

"Kakashi's… way with women." Sandaime explained to his son.

"Oh! Mr-I-lost-mine-when-I-was-eleven?" Asuma nodded.

Sandaime, Yondaime and Jiraya looked at each other then at Kakashi.

"Is this true?" Jiraya asked the silver haired youngster.

"Yes." Kakashi answered with his eyes glued at a spot on the floor.

"They're in." both the older men nodded.

"And the others are already accepted." They nodded at each other and smirked.

"And now on to business, I've been thinking about writing a book. Actually I have done a draft of it. Should I read a chapter or two?" Jiraya wondered.

"Why not." Hiashi yawned and Hizashi nodded, both bored out of their mind

"Junko walked down to the local bar…." Jiraya began reading and the mood perked up as they realized that this was no ordinary romance novel and it was very detailed indeed.

Umino Iruka blushed fiercely as the white haired man read about clothes thrown away in bliss and hands roaming bodies. Genma smirked and chewed on the senbon he had in his mouth. Asuma giggled and Kakashi was totally interested in this book, very good writing.

"Did you enjoy?" Jiraya asked as he finished the first chapter and the men nodded while the youngsters blushed and nodded, although Kakashi had his mask covering half of his face you could still notice the blushing on his cheeks.

"Very good my student." Sandaime nodded.

"I agree sensei." Yondaime smirked.

"No words." Hiashi said and Hizashi nodded.

"Approved." Ibiki said and the corners of his mouth jerked up a bit.

"Stunned." Genma smirked and chewed some more on the senbon.

"Interesting." Asuma agrees and smiled.

"Very detailed." Iruka added quietly.

"Excellent." Kakashi approved.

"Eh, does it have any plot?" Obito wondered.

The whole room burst out laughing and tears falling down blushing cheeks, men holding their stomachs for aches.

"What?" he wondered and the others were still laughing clutching their stomachs, and not being able to breathe properly.

"What's so funny?" he wondered again.

"The plot is the sex, my young student." Yondaime explained as he dried his eyes from the tears.

"ooh." Obito nodded and blushed.

* * *

So what do y'all think? Short I know, Bet you never would have guessed what Keps stands for (Konoha's Expert Peeping Squad)


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you all your comments! Makes me happy.

Last time:

"_The plot is the sex, my young student." Yondaime explained as he dried his eyes from the tears. _

"_ooh." Obito nodded and blushed. _

* * *

"So now over to the latest findings. Hiashi, Hizashi you two go first." Jiraya told the young boys.

"Well we haven't done anything out of the ordinary." They both shrugged and smirked evilly.

"I wish I had the Byakugan …" Jiraya whined.

"What?!" Iruka shireked.

"Their bloodline limit…" Yondaime said and motioned towards the twins.

"What does it do?" Obito wondered.

"In short? You can see through things." Sandaime answered and turned to the Hyuuga twins while continuing:

"Can't you just tell your story so our newcomers can enjoy your Byakugan?"

"Sure, I'll go first." Hizashi said and his older brother nodded.

"So I was on a mission to, you know that farm up north with the sweet daughter." The whole room nodded in agreement and the younger Hyuuga continued:

"I was out in the fields doing you know what and she comes up to me with a glass of orange juice and tells me she'll be back before I go and that I'm welcomed to use their onsen when I'm done working."

"Ah, young love…" Jiraya said sighing.

"Then I keep working and after an hour, maybe two she came back and we finished up together. She told me that she was going to use the onsen while I had a lay down in the shadows for rest. And she did…" he had continued.

"You didn't.." Sandaime gasped.

"I sure did, and you'd never guess what she did…" Hizashi said.

"What?!" Genma shrieked.

"Did she?" Yondaime said and smiled.

"She didn't" Jiraya gasped.

"She sure did." Hizashi nodded and smirked as he remembered.

And realization dawned on Kakashi, he wasn't a genius for nothing and he gasped, Hyuuga Hizashi had seen a beautiful sight a woman pleasuring herself.

"What did she do?" Obito asked confused.

Kakashi whispered to Iruka who poked his shoulder when he heard Kakashi gasp, and Iruka blushed fiercely as Kakashi explained the sight, very close to reality to Genma, Asuma, Ibiki and of course Iruka.

Jiraya smirked; this kid was certainly going to help him in writing his books. Maybe even get a little credit for it some day, but not today the old man smirked and chuckled to himself.

The blonde Hokage smiled at his student, Kakashi was certainly walking in his own footsteps. He felt a sense of pride whelm up inside of him.

"And then you did?" Genma took the senbon out of his mouth asking the question.

"Nothing any young man wouldn't…" Hizashi answered.

"He stayed under the tree and waited for her to be finished and come out from the onsen. Chicken." Hiashi mocked his younger brother, smiling.

"You would have done the same, her dad is mean I say." Hizashi said and they all agreed. He asked:

"So what did you other people do this week?"

"Ehm, I kind of walked in on something I shouldn't have." Iruka said and Asuma snorted and nodded. He had been there to.

"What? Now spill." Sandaime said and saw the Hatake kid blush and look another way.

"Ah I think I understand, then with whom?"

"Who was it Kakashi?" Yondaime demanded an answer.

"I'm not telling…" Kakashi answered.

"Good boy, loyalty is important." Jiraya was impressed and the two Hokages nodded in agreement.

"And now Yondaime Hokage what did you do this passed week?" Hiashi wondered.

"Well I had to run a few errands, nothing else, I have been cooped up in our office and training my young students." He answered and made a floating motion towards Kakashi and Obito.

"So what do you usually tell when you tell things?" Iruka wondered blushing madly.

"We tell each other everything. Almost." Sandaime chuckled.

"Oh." Iruka only managed to say and nodded. The young Uchiha winced, he did not want to be in a room of adults doing…what ever they now where doing. It was mean to keep him in the dark. Honestly he didn't understand what he was doing there, his mind started wandering and he began thinking of his female team mate, and how she was going to react to Kakashi having sex with a woman other then her.

"Kakashi-san what are we going to do?" the dark haired Iruka whispered to the silver haried guy next to him.

"What do you mean?" he whispered back as the men were discussing something concerning the hermit's book, Icha Icha-something.

"They are obviously busy. Should we leave?" Iruka wondered.

"I don't know…" Kakashi began,

"What are you two whispering about, we are about to leave." Sandaime Hokage told the youngsters.

"Ah, well. Nothing actually." Iruka said blushing and staring at the floor.

"Iruka-chan I know you're lying, but I'll let you of the hook this time." Sandaime continued.

"So, we will see you all next week at the same place, same time." Yondaime exclaimed and turned to the young ones:

"To hear all of your stories, my friends."

* * *

A/N: Well, it's a short chappie, and maybe a little guess on whom Kakashi was with when Iruka dropped by.

Any requests for pairlings? Adventures and misshappenings?


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